Have I.?

My mum isn't home for days. I begin to miss her. She has been going out till late night, staying over at friend's house, going malaysia with friends and all recently. Don't know what she said was true, but what's the point of lying. I know that she still cares about us. Is just that she thinks friends are much more important to her for the time being.

I can understand that she needs more "personal time", as she has contributed a lot for this family. But I still think that this isn't appropriate for a housewife, and her health. I have noticed that she has been drinking, due to the alcohol scent that her breath had produced.

Though I did not show much care and concern in the suface, I still feel for her. I missed the days that our family went outing, eating and all together. However, these were like ages ago. =( People used to say that family is always there for you. But I somehow think that this doesn't fit in my situation. I feel lonely at times. Conversely, I pity my dad more.

He works almost everyday. His life is nothing but working. Working for us, the family. He has no much friend, leisure time. I feel sad when I see him eating out alone, yet i couldn't do much about it. I feel distant, we have nothing much to talk unlike the past. My heart is ordering me to do something but these messages could not be covey to my nerves and all. =(

I really feel bad; sad for him. He contribute so much for this family and yet nothing he gets in return. Till now, he still has to work to provide us, this family; and no one ever show appreciation to it, including me. =( So ashamed of myself.

He is so poor thing. All he do during his off days were maintaining his motorbike, his plants, sleeps and eat. So sad eh. All his daughters are useless. I am useless. Daddy so old now, yet we still make him work. =(

I admit that I am useless, lazy, dependent. Haiyaaaaaaaaaaa. I want to do something, but its just so awkward and I'm so damn lazy. What the hell, sooooo insincereeee. Don't know what more to say myself. JUST USELESS EH!!!!!!!! =\

DADDY MUMMY, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

Labels: family